THE HUMAN MANIFESTO

MANIFESTING SINCE FEBRUARY 27 AT 1:38 P.M.

What a fuckin day!!!! Jesh

So, after having been to BED, I came home to a hell. In an attempt to make my house cozy and nice, I had bought a plant and a new vase. I came home to several magazines ripped apart, a broken vase, an eaten plant, and piss everywhere. As I surveyed the damage, my dog, who apparently wasn’t to happy that I wasn’t in my bed, decided to piss again, front of me. ARRRGHHHH. I nearly committed murder. I put him out, cleaned the house and tried to sleep. No good. So, a couple of strong glasses of Johnny Walker and a late night conversation, with a potential suitor, I finanlly got to sleep. But I missed my morning group class and got up in time to walk Chocky.

As we walked around, him taking forever to find a dump spot, I,still in a drunken stage, daydreaming, dropped my keys on the ground. Now, while that isn’t unusual, what makes it is where I dropped it.

The sidewalks, if you can call them that in Taipei, not only have grates but these holes that I think are there to assist with the draining of the massive rain water we get during typhoon season. There in a split second, my keys dropped into one of these ‘useful’ holes. Arrrrghhh. What was going to do? So, I run back, grab my building guard, who I hope would help me figure out to do. He looked at me like I had just asked him to figure out world peace. So, thinking smart, I take Chocky’s leash off thinking, that the hook on the lease could help me retrieve my keys and get to class. Nope, Chocky took that as an opportunity to run free. So, as I am calling him to come, he’s looking at me, and running father and father away. Now, I’ve lost my dog and my keys. All before 12pm.

So, first thing first. I get a hanger, to fish out the keys. As I am on the ground, I am beginning to attract the interest of some very bored Taiwanese. I am fishing out a set of keys, that I could see and couldn’t see, I finally get them.

As I walk around looking for Chocky, I begin to think that maybe it’s okay that I no longer have a dog. But isn’t it ironic that he would run away, the day after I bought a $23 bag of dog food?

So, I also, begin to worry because I think that I could go to class, then come back to look for him. But the city is so big, that where would I find him? Also, maybe it’s not okay that I don’t have a dog, anymore. Because Chocky was beginning to help me break out of my shell, and was my people connector. So, as I have all these thoughts running thru my head, I am walking up to my apartment,and up pops Chocky’s head in the doorway. Wagging his tail, like ‘what took you so long?” The dammed dog had ran back to the house and up 12 flights of stairs. So, I get to class, and tell my teacher all of this, who tells me that I should buy a lottery ticket. I come home, sleep and when I get up to walk Chocky again, I nearly lose my keys again in the big drain grate this time. Someone should cover those things……………………..
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2 comments on “What a fuckin day!!!! Jesh

  1. Maoman
    September 27, 2004

    Jennifer, you need to get your dog a crate – you’d never let a five year old run around unattended, why would you let a puppy? (They can be just as destructive.) When you’re done that, read up on crate training. Or give me a call. I’d be happy to share any canine tips over a cup of coffee. Also, get your dog microchipped, if he isn’t already. Labs are NOT cut out to be street animals, and if Chocky gets lost, you’ll need to know how to get him back. Have a good holiday tomorrow. Good to read that you’re starting to have some fun!

  2. Namahottie
    October 1, 2004

    Being that I am in taiwan, and doing as the romans do, I would let a 5 yr old run around….

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This entry was posted on September 27, 2004 by in Uncategorized.
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