MANIFESTING SINCE FEBRUARY 27 AT 1:38 P.M.
It’s been awhile since I’ve written. I have been thinking over and over what to write. Something eloquent, something poetic, something inspirational. But I can’t think of anything since the past two months have been difficult. No, rather filled with violence.
What is someone to do when some one is verbally or physically violent toward you? Especially when you are living in a foreign country? The lines become blurred. The first violent act occurred while on vacation with my vacation partner. Verbal abuse. The next was physical abuse on the street by some unknown stranger while I was driving. Either way, I have been left shell shocked. It alters how you deal with the landscape around you. And the way you cope. I am trying hard not to play the victim role telling myself that I can make it. That it will get better. I also oscillate between hatred and compassion for those who stuck out at me. The hatred comes from wanting to be right about where they were wrong, and the compassion realizing that they require something that I can’t give. All this occurring in a foreign country ups something in me that I can’t verbalize.